five funny things from this week.

1. "Can we make this quick? I left my daughter and three dogs in the car."
--A woman at Coco's speaking to her realtor.

2. Bottled water has an expiration date. How the hell does water go bad?

3. A friend of mine was joking around about white supremecy. I pointed out that he had a shaved head, wore a leather jacket, and had a superman shirt on.

4. The funniest combination of sounds in the english language (divorced from meaning) is "semiotic poopjoint."

5. "I like me a lot more when I'm unconscious at night."
--Me, epiphonizing.

[a good week]
-brian