Ring Tonez and Hot Shades
This weekend proved very lucrative for me. First of all, Tim provided me with a very nice Sanyo camera phone with flipping action to replace my previous Nokia with a far less convenient feature called lobat. "Lobat" is, in short, a unique battery which lets you talk for up to five minutes before requiring that you plug your phone into something... a wall, a carjack, a stray bird... you know, any conventional power source.
And the Nokia's back plate slid off when hit with even the slightest breeze. I'd get a call, pull it out, and watch as the back end of the phone sailed away with the force I exerted to casually pull it out of my pocket.
Nokia: thinking ahead.
Anyway, many thanks to Tim for the new cell. But I had to make it my own, and I thought to myself, "What better and more original way to express my individuality than to download a band singing one of their songs as a ringtone?! Goodness, I'll be so unique that people will have to love me!"
So I surfed over to Vision, Sprint's ostentatiously-titled phone-based internet service. The interface was clunky and slow enough that I began to haggle with my cell phone. Basically, I proposed that it would behave and I wouldn't throw it into an empty field. I slowly browsed through thousands of bands of whom I had never heard in search of anything that I thought would even remotely make a good ringtone: Sasha, Death Cab, Frou Frou, even David Bowie.
But, much to my chagrin, none of those bands were available. I finally settled on Incubus, downloading "Agoraphobia" so that all passers-by would know that I too wanted to stay inside for good whenever anyone called me.
It cost me 2.50 + tax + whatever they charge for the bandwidth. But, I thought it worth it.
That is, until I opened the ringtone to test it out. Words cannot entirely communicate exactly what it sounds like, but I will try and cover the basics...
"Fifhsingind I wanna-fshhsh-stay ins---de, I wan-a-shhhzt stay asdhf-side for good..."
It sounded like Incubus recorded this piece in front of an airplane taking off, and just like the intakes, it sucked. I guess I'll have to find some other band to help me express my individuality through the medium of a ringtone.
Anyway, I said this weekend was profitable and it was. Not only did I get a cell phone from Tim, I also got some cool stuff from my parents. They went to NYC for a vacation last week, and came home with quite a few gifts for my sister and me.
I got a novelty Statue of Liberty lighter, two pretty fashionable tee-shirts which mislead people to believe that I've been to the Big Apple, and my favorite gift of all... and I mean ever...
a pair of hot Oakley sunglasses.
When I say "hot," I don't mean in the sense that they are incredibly fashionable. They are--they're Oakleys, after all. But I mean hot in another sense.
I will leave you to parse that and move on.
My Oakleys [or "Oaks" as I like to call them] don't hold a candle to what they got for my sister... girls, are you paying attention?
They got her a genuine Louis Vuitton bag [complete with lock, leather tag, and "LVs" covering the face of it] for... are you ready?
50 dollars.
I must say, that's a hot handbag. As hot as my sunglasses.
God bless my parents, and God bless NYC. I've heard that there are a lot of very nice shopkeepers on the street there.
[I heart NYC]
brian
And the Nokia's back plate slid off when hit with even the slightest breeze. I'd get a call, pull it out, and watch as the back end of the phone sailed away with the force I exerted to casually pull it out of my pocket.
Nokia: thinking ahead.
Anyway, many thanks to Tim for the new cell. But I had to make it my own, and I thought to myself, "What better and more original way to express my individuality than to download a band singing one of their songs as a ringtone?! Goodness, I'll be so unique that people will have to love me!"
So I surfed over to Vision, Sprint's ostentatiously-titled phone-based internet service. The interface was clunky and slow enough that I began to haggle with my cell phone. Basically, I proposed that it would behave and I wouldn't throw it into an empty field. I slowly browsed through thousands of bands of whom I had never heard in search of anything that I thought would even remotely make a good ringtone: Sasha, Death Cab, Frou Frou, even David Bowie.
But, much to my chagrin, none of those bands were available. I finally settled on Incubus, downloading "Agoraphobia" so that all passers-by would know that I too wanted to stay inside for good whenever anyone called me.
It cost me 2.50 + tax + whatever they charge for the bandwidth. But, I thought it worth it.
That is, until I opened the ringtone to test it out. Words cannot entirely communicate exactly what it sounds like, but I will try and cover the basics...
"Fifhsingind I wanna-fshhsh-stay ins---de, I wan-a-shhhzt stay asdhf-side for good..."
It sounded like Incubus recorded this piece in front of an airplane taking off, and just like the intakes, it sucked. I guess I'll have to find some other band to help me express my individuality through the medium of a ringtone.
Anyway, I said this weekend was profitable and it was. Not only did I get a cell phone from Tim, I also got some cool stuff from my parents. They went to NYC for a vacation last week, and came home with quite a few gifts for my sister and me.
I got a novelty Statue of Liberty lighter, two pretty fashionable tee-shirts which mislead people to believe that I've been to the Big Apple, and my favorite gift of all... and I mean ever...
a pair of hot Oakley sunglasses.
When I say "hot," I don't mean in the sense that they are incredibly fashionable. They are--they're Oakleys, after all. But I mean hot in another sense.
I will leave you to parse that and move on.
My Oakleys [or "Oaks" as I like to call them] don't hold a candle to what they got for my sister... girls, are you paying attention?
They got her a genuine Louis Vuitton bag [complete with lock, leather tag, and "LVs" covering the face of it] for... are you ready?
50 dollars.
I must say, that's a hot handbag. As hot as my sunglasses.
God bless my parents, and God bless NYC. I've heard that there are a lot of very nice shopkeepers on the street there.
[I heart NYC]
brian
posted by brian at
12:42 PM
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