Yeah, I've Scene That

Biola has some really neat student-organized activities, especially when it comes to music. Tonight was the kickoff of "the eddy," a concert held every Thursday on campus.

The eddy books bands you know and bands you don't, but all them are decent. It makes for an evening of good (free) entertainment, and on a Thursday too. I still get to have my weekends to do whatever I want.

While the music is enjoyable, and the admission free, I would still like to air a grievance.

Since the eddy plays host to indie, emo, and other bands in the same vein, these concerts draw a certain type of crowd. They stand in front of the stage, and really just stand there. No moving—they just stand. They're messy-haired, pink-shirted, tight-pantsed, sullen-faced, angst-filled 20-somethings who don't like you.

That's right: most of the audience is "scene." What is "scene," you ask? "Scene" means they know something you don't, and they're happy about it.

Yes, I'm generalizing. Not everyone who has refined musical or cinematic tastes is an ass-butt.

But let's be honest: a lot of scene people think they're better than "the crowd." I have had the tenacity to ask sceners (as I like to call them) for music recommendations, and 9 of the 10 times it has gone something like this might:

Brian: Hey, Trey.
Trey: Hey.
Brian: Are you doing all right? You look down.
Trey: I'm all right. But not too all right, just all right enough to keep myself from affecting you in any meaningful way.
Brian: Oh, that's good to hear… uh… hey, I was wondering…
Trey: ?
Brian: Could you, you know, recommend a few bands to me?
Trey: You want me to recommend some groups?
Brian: Yeah. See, I'm trying to expand my music horizons.
Trey: Cool. Have you heard of [geographic region + Greek god]?
Brian: No.
Trey: Oh. How about [Weather Condition + Day of Week]?
Brian: Nuh-uh.
Trey: How about [Adverb + Random Number]?
Brian: Wait! Are they the ones who play "Send Me Down?"
Trey: No, that's [Synonymous Adverb + Random Number*2].
Brian. Oh. I've heard of them.
Trey: Well, yeah. They're mainstream.
Brian: So can you just recommend a band I might like?
Trey: Yeah, pick up the Summer Winds LP from [fourth band you've never heard of].
Brian: Okaaaaaay. Thanks.

That's all well and good. I'm music illiterate, and I know it. Why else would I ask for recommendations? The hold-up is that, instead of recommending something I could probably get my hands on, I'm directed towards an LP that is almost impossible to acquire. Why? Because nobody but the scene people know about the group.

I have the sneaking suspicion that he does this to mock me.

Well, I have prepared a retaliation tool. The next time I go to an eddy, and someone starts talking about how they like Cinder better than the band that's playing, I'll do this:

Brian: Cinder? Yeah, they're okay.
Trey: You've heard of Cinder?
Brian: Yeah. Well, I was trying to find something like Death by Desire that would appeal to my mainstream friends.
Trey: Cinder's not mainstream.
Brian: Compared to Death by Desire, they are.
Trey: I've never heard of Death by Desire.
Brian: Really? Oh, wow. How about Grassland Apollo?
Trey: No…
Brian: Cloud Wednesday?
Trey: [bemused look]
Brian: The When Sisters?
Trey: Who?
Brian: Wow. Have you at least heard of Fide?
Trey: Uh…
Brian: You haven't heard of Fide? [look at watch] Well, I should probably be going…

And then I leave.

Two can play this game. All I have to do is make up convincing band names to win.

[hey, check out the new Sober Future LP]
brian