Mao

Deity: Let there be a card game, and it shall be called Mao.
Lesser Deity: Mao?
Deity: Mao.
Lesser Deity: Why Mao?
Deity: Why not Mao?
Lesser Deity: Good point.
Deity: I thought you would agree.
Lesser Deity: So how does one play Mao?
Deity: That.... is unknown!
Lesser Deity: Unknown?
Deity: Unknown.
Lesser Deity: Why?
Deity: Why not?
Lesser Deity: Because if people do not know how to play, then they will not know how to win. And people don't like to play games that they cannot win.
Deity: You have turned logic against me, fiend! I shall fly at thee!
[Deity flies at thee]
Lesser Deity: Wait! Instead of hurting me, why not make up rules for the game?
[Deity stops flying at thee]
Deity: I shall consider this. [considers] You make a compelling argument.
Lesser Deity: Good.
Deity: The rules of the game are... that there are no known rules of the game!
Lesser Deity: No known rules?!
Deity: Precisely!
Lesser Deity: But then people cannot win!
Deity: Yes they can!
Lesser Deity: How can they win if there are no rules?
Deity: Who said there are no rules?
Lesser Deity:You just did.
Deity: Did I?
Lesser Deity: Yes!
Deity: DID I?
Lesser Deity: I heard you say that there are no known rules to Mao---
Deity: Precisely!
Lesser Deity: What do you mean?
Deity: There are no known rules for the game of Mao. However, there are rules.
Lesser Deity: How will the people play then?
Deity: [considers] I have it! Some few shall know!
Lesser Deity: But who decides who shall know and who shall not?
Deity: Hush, Lesser Deity, lest I fly at thee again! Will not the Mao go whither it goes?
Lesser Deity: Uh...
Deity: It shall! Let there be no confusion. Mao shall make its own way in the world of Man!
Lesser Deity: But how?
Deity: Are you sure you want to know?
Lesser Deity: Not really.
Deity: SURE?
Lesser Deity: Uh... yes...
[Deity looks left, right, left again]
Deity: [whispers] Come in closer.
Lesser Deity: What?
Deity: [whispers louder] Come in closer!
Lesser Deity: [comes in closer] Okay.
Deity: Mao shall make its own way in the world of Man, through...
Lesser Deity: Through?
Deity: Through....
Lesser Deity: THROUGH?
Deity: [whispers] Secret knowledge.
Lesser Deity: ! Brilliant!
Deity: I know!
Lesser Deity: So how shall we begin to spread the Mao?
Deity: Let us make just a few rules, and don the garb of humans, and give them what's for!
Lesser Deity: Yes, let's!
[Voices trailing off]
Deity: So I was thinking that the Aces should work as [!*#*@!]...
Lesser Deity: I see. And the 8's, what about if they [$&*_@$$]?
Deity: Brilliant!
Lesser Deity: What a good idea...

[go play it. if you dare.]
brian